We make ourselves suffer when we (1) put our ‘self’ before others, (2) fear loss to that invented ‘self’, and (3) pin the blame on someone else.
People-pleasing, playing by other people’s rules, is tiring, and may not lead to happiness.
Being criticised is part of life. If we’re going to be happy, we’d better learn to cope with hearing criticism, and even welcoming it.
Are some of your relationships marked by resentment? Many people, especially after difficult times, forget to reintroduce gratitude and reward into their relationships.
Sometimes a helpless, unloved role has become a second skin, so that we cannot imagine there is another way to live. But there is. We are all able to initiate and negotiate help for ourselves, and love for ourselves.
Arguments escalate because we cannot wait to get our words in. Simple accepting that the other has spoken is a powerful tool for peace.