The ‘pain body’ is a little monster inside us that wants to feed on a sense of personal suffering and insult.
By treating others as special, and being curious about them, we can escape our own selfishness.
We get too protective over our ‘self image’. The ‘self’ we are protecting may not even exist.
Managing our reputation is reasonable. But we can become excessively self-protective, and fall out socially. We can train ourselves into better habits.
In good relationships, we are responsible for our own happiness. But this doesn’t mean suffering in silence. We can also express our reasonable hopes and expectations.
Sometimes, by spending less energy trying to impress others, we can develop a more authentic, relaxed lifestyle.