Equanimity is frightening to many. Equanimity is calm acceptance, remaining peaceful in response to something. If you have equanimity with everything, then you have complete peace.
THINGS YOU DISAGREE WITH
We disagree with many things, usually, during a day. In fact, the disagreements are the things that cause us anxiety. Just as the bodily system disagrees with certain foods, so the mental system disagrees with certain experiences. The difference, however, with the mental system is that it is much more amendable and flexible than the bodily system.
The more you disagree with, the more upset you get in a day.
THINGS YOU AGREE WITH
We also agree with some things during a day.
There is attached agreement, when we agree with something because we are greedy or fearful for ourselves. This kind of agreement is like agreeing with an enemy army because we do not want to get killed. It is only expediency. It can eventually backfire, when life changes, and we are stuck looking silly because of a weak attachment. Some romances are like this, attachments which we grow out of. Relationships with bad food, drugs or alcohol can work like this too.
There is also mindful agreement, when we notice that something we see or hear is good. This is our discretion, and we can use it to filter teachings and teachers, so that we select what we need at any one time. This kind of agreement is also expediency, in the sense that it is practical. But, because we have our eye on development, it is more likely to lead to long-term happiness.
THINGS YOU ARE ABLE TO FACE WITH EQUANIMITY
Some things, we can just be with, without agreeing or disagreeing. An example is a good friend, where perhaps we can just sit together. We don’t have to agree with them, because the relationship is beyond simple agreement or disagreement. The more we develop, the more things fall into this category. Eventually, if we are lucky, everything may fall into this category, and we would then be able to face each day peacefully, without overreacting to what is presented to us.
What do I disagree with? If I analyse my disagreement, can I trace it to my biology, or my personal history, or even views that I have adopted as real, even though I have no proof.
What do I agree with? If I analyse my agreement… just as with disagreement, can I trace it to my biology, or my personal history, or even views that I accept as real, even though there is no proof?
What am I able to face with equanimity? In other words, what can I accept calmly? Can I accept more and more things, until, before I die, all things are included in the category of things I accept peacefully.
When I can accept all things peacefully, I will be at peace always.